Monday, May 7, 2018

What Is, Is NANNA! - (By A Devotee)

My experience with Nannagaru, though short, contained all I needed for a life time. In America, I had, for several years gone to school, and been like any normal student. It wasn’t until my mom had gone to India, to Nannagaru, that my life began to change. Before I had even heard the word spirituality, or of Nannagaru and Bhagavan’s teachings, when I looked at a photo of Nannagaru or Bhagavan, I felt like there was something else to the photo. It was something strange, that I couldn’t understand. This, actually, kind of made me a bit scared to look at any of the few photos we had in our house. But then, in 5th grade, I started to understand what this feeling was.

Love Itself Is The Actual Form Of God!

It all started on a day like any other, in 5th grade, where I had just come home from school. I had a English essay I had to finish for my teacher, so I thought I’d work on it. When I opened my laptop, I saw the Sadguru Sri Nannagaru website open, and on the home page. I saw a specific picture of Nannagaru and for some reason, stood up to get a paper and pencil. Then, I just started sketching by looking at the photo. I didn’t know what to expect or what I was doing. I was just doing what I felt. There was just something that came over me, which I can never put into words.When I finished sketching, I showed my mom. Later, after we had gone out for an art show, I colored it using color pencils. The result was to my extreme surprise, for I had zero experience in drawing people. This changed my life from any regular student, to one for Nannagaru.

Bhagavan’s Assurance!

From then on, I no longer cared much for the world, but instead found my interest in Nannagaru and Bhagavan. I started to understand what illusion this world really is, and what a human’s role is in life. Then, one night, I had a dream, where Bhagavan came, and merely said that the world is not real and that I was to find out soon. I woke up in deep surprise, unsure of what to think of my dream, except that I now knew what my path was.

Trust in Guru is only Sadhana!

One day, while returning from the mall, all of a sudden, I looked at my mom, and I could feel myself starting to cry, wondering why my mom was so peaceful and got to see Nannagaru so much, when I couldn’t.

Then, I worked on a charcoal art piece and when it was finished, sent it to Nannagaru through my mom’s friend. I waited for a while and when I got the video of Nannagaru seeing the art, I just cried a lot for some reason. When Nannagaru asked who did it, people were explaining who did it, but just by my name he seemed to recognize me, even after I hadn’t been to India for 5 years! The smile he gave then was simply beautiful.
Guru’s First Glance!

Next, during Winter Break at school, we came to India, and met Nannagaru for the first time that I can remember. It was only for two days but was simply amazing. I can only say I saw him for about 15-20 minutes because I had to also watch my brother outside. But in those few minutes, he smiled at me in an unforgettable way.

Surrender To Me, I’ll Take Care Of You!

For 6th grade, I was starting Middle school so I went for a camp to prepare us and teach us what middle school would be like. One of the camp days, we were reseting our school network passwords and I was unsure what to change mine to. Then, the idea of using Arunachala as my network password came to me and I was happy with the password and awed at how quickly I got saved from not having a reset password.

Selfless Work!
One Look, One Touch, One Word!

In the Fall of 2017, I had convinced my mom to let me miss a few days of school and see Nannagaru again. When I saw him, I gave him a charcoal drawing, and how much he appreciated it was both surprising, and inspiring. Then, during the morning section of the Birthday Celebrations, I got the opportunity to give him another charcoal drawing. This time, things came out in a completely unexpected way. Nannagaru, simply adored it, not to mention I was in complete awe, and with his will, for the first time, I had felt his gracious touch. I learned an important lesson that day, “any work that is done with selflessness, has its own rewards, if not pride.” That day probably raised into the best day in my life.

While at this trip, I also got some books blessed by Nannagaru, and out of all the books I’ve read, these are my favorite. Among these are The Gita for Children by Roopa Pai and Letters from Ramanashram by Suri Nagamma. These two books inspired me very much, but Nannagaru, the day he gave The Gita book to me, seemed to like it very much. Then, when I had read the book, the way it was styled in writing, and the lessons to learn from it were in direct relation to the type of reading I liked. It seemed Nannagaru had understood me to the point that he also knew how much I liked story based books.

Nanna Is Working!

In Art class at school, we were doing a paper mache “culture sculpture”, in which we each made our own sculpture that represents you in some way. I had many ideas like doing a paintbrush but suddenly I got one undefeatable idea. I thought I’d do a sculpture of Arunachalam! I wasn’t sure what made me do it, for I knew a realistic mountain would be very time taking. But I still did it. It was amazing how when I did something like this, time worked in my favor. In fact, I finished two days prior to the due date!

The Outer Guru Is Saying That The Real Guru Is Within!

Later, in December, my mom went and came back from India without me, and saw Nannagaru. Then, on December 29th, I was sleeping, and my mom was trying to wake me up. Knowing that my mom never wakes me up by shaking me, I looked at her very confused. Then she broke the news of Nannagaru’s samadhi to me. I couldn’t help but cry. For some reason that day, I could not be myself. Whenever I got a chance, I’d look at the few pictures I had of him, hoping for assurance that he was still here.

Then, on an unexpected day in January, I got my assurance. I had a piano recital that day, and was very nervous. I had practiced the song I was playing and mastered it to the best of my ability. When I was in line to go up for my performance, for a minute second, a force overcame my body, and I just heard Nannagaru’s voice, “I am still here.” I didn’t know what to make of it, except that now I knew 100% that he is there with me. When I went to perform, I did make many mistakes, but I felt they didn’t matter that much since the main event for me was my assurance of Nannagaru’s presence.

Have Faith In Yourself!

Once, my school friend texted me a inappropriate message which was seen by my parents. They, like any other parents guarded me and corrected me to be careful. I, within myself struggled a lot thinking, “Is this something I really want Bhagavan?” and I slept thinking over it.

The next day, I had another dream where Nannagaru’s voice was echoing saying that, “Your path is spirituality.”

Nannagaru has changed my life in many ways, and has always shown me the way to go. He had given me the initiative towards art and math, and has warned me of what to expect in my teenage years. He is my best friend and my inspiration. He is an embodiment of love, compassion, and kindness and I believe that he is still here with us today, and will always be there for a tomorrow.